Roasted Red Pepper Pasta + Shaved Asparagus Slaw
Yesterday was a good day. & more like this weekend was a truly good weekend. In the midst of self-quarantining & embracing life as a homebody (which I must admit I am kind of loving), I made the shift from being stressed about the current state of our world & the financial implications it’s having on me/our business to feeling really fucking grateful for this time with my family. I’m having fun at-home. In the midst of all this crazy, we’re making the most of it and having fun. Movies, puzzles, at home projects, quality time in the kitchen (my most craved at home time) are all going down in the Zehner house, and we’re making the most of being forced to hit the pause button on our life.
It’s a welcomed shift from my mindset when the stay at home orders got passed down, & I’m not naive. Do we have a business that’s kind of just sitting & not producing revenue? Yes. Is that stressful? Yes. Does is make me worry about recovering and having larger implications to our ability to support our own business? Yes. Does this mean I’m not getting an income right now? Yes. A lot of “yes” answers around kind of stressful situations, & last week I started having these day dreams that I’m going to fast forward 10 years and I’m doing an interview on Dateline talking about how we thought we’d stay calm & ride out the storm of the COVID pandemic, but we never did, and I’m there to talk about losing everything. Like my own version of dooms day actively being created and playing out in my own head, and causing a couple anxiety attacks to ensue.
At the same time, I’m sharing these thoughts with my husband, trying to loop him on the stress and worry I feel surrounding this situation, totally with the purpose of baiting him to reassure me everything will be fine, which he, of course, has done. We watched this episode of Modern Family last night & Claire described how her and Phil are such a good, balanced match because “she’s little high strung and he has an infectious lust for life.” I mean - I already see a little of me and Jordan in Claire & Phil, but that statement spoke to me (& I think us) so much we both started busting up laughing as soon as it was said. I’m definitely a little high strung, and Jordan is my “everything will be ok” or “we’ll get through this” voice of reason. So long story short, as things kind of started to unfold, particularly the certainty of closing our business doors & halting a paycheck to myself, my really awesome high-strung side started to come out and I sought Jordan’s calm, cool and collected attitude to put everything back in perspective. & naturally, he met with a “let’s make the most of not having to be at the beck & call of our bar” attitude, & presented me with an optimistic attitude that was the needed antagonist to what I had going on. I went from freaking out on the inside, worrying about myself and going down the gloomy path of picturing my life drastically changing as a result of this whole thing, to accepting that staying still is my only option, and trusting that everything will be ok. Acceptance is the operative word here, & accepting the situation is what I did. Largely thanks to my husband & his rosy perspective. Long story short, I’ve been able to go from wishing everything was back to normal to enjoying the time for what it is now, and right now that means a lot of time with just our family of four.
I was able to hit the reset on my own life recently, which has been pretty pivotal for me. I recently journaled about how our trip to Utah kind of got me out of a funk I was in. I’d been not my best self for a while, just slipping back into negative thoughts, feeling kind of lonely, and letting that spiral me into what I’d shamefully call a bit of depression. Sure - not everything or everyday was bad, but the feeling of being on my own felt lonely at times, and the biggest downside was not appreciating the quality time that was available to me. Whether it was time I could use to take care of myself or just enjoy the small moments with my husband, I wasn’t taking advantage of what I did have available & just found myself in the cycle of being overwhelmed by having “not enough time.” This trip to Utah I expected to just get through unexpectedly broke me from my funk & I had this moment that I was really present and was able to feel the joy I had of just being with my husband, with good friends sitting across from us, and I was really happy. Moreover, I was able to have this realization that these relaxing moments maybe don’t come as often as I want, but they do always come and they’re always rejuvenating. It was reconnecting with the warm feeling of having a quality moment with Jordan that I promised myself I’d make more time to carve out peaceful, rejuvenating moments, even if it was at odd hours or times, and actively acknowledge//be ok with sacrifices that came along with it. It was moments like this trip that woke me up to see that protected & carved out quality time makes work and time not at home when I want to be feel worth it. Since we’ve been home I’ve actively tried to protect these quality moments with just us two. Granted - quality time has been easier to come by in quarantine, & that’s the part I’m so grateful for. Just realizing that I’ve missed being home and now having that time to be a caretaker is a blessing.
My point is we went on vacation, and came back with the inability to return to our normal life. Work schedules and outside demands have been removed as dictators ruling our schedule. We have the energy to take part in real activities - reading, puzzling, games. & our at-home meals have gone from something quick and easy to more intentional (which I totally love). We’re able to get back to relishing in that quality meal-time that used to be our savior before we started working together. We have time to experiment and last week we focused on kitchen experimenting with vegetarian meals, like this Roasted Red Pepper Pasta + Cold Arugula Slaw. A meal that plated up so nicely and was savored as we embraced a rejuvenating dinner time at home. The thing I’m putting a lot of thought & preparation into is how to keep myself un-funked when the inevitable happens - when we return to work & the restriction of time returns as a factor in our life we can’t ignore. I’ve placed a big emphasis on time management, and I have plans to heavily utilize my schedule to avoid feeling continuously overwhelmed, but I don’t have the perfect answer.
For now, I’m going to revel in the fact that these at-home meals & regular time in the kitchen are making up for moments we’ve missed out on. & this veggie heavy dish distinguished by its bright orange color & up-front roasted red pepper taste is one of the best thing to come out of our quarantine kitchen thus far. Paired with fresh arugula mixed in with the pasta & a Shaved Asparagus Salad for a couple extra elements of freshness, it was a meal that was light and easy to enjoy a large bowlful. It sparked enough joy to have it marked as a new additional to our vegetarian repertoire, and we even made sure to up our quarantine stash of roasted red peppers in anticipation for round 2 of this one.
For the Pasta Sauce
1-12oz jar of roasted red pepper (totally fine if you have a bit of a bigger jar), drained
about 3 tbsp of half & half
1/4 c. grated parmesan cheese
Pinch of garlic powder
Salt & pepper
1 can of white beans, drained
Red pepper flakes
Dried pasta or cauliflower gnocchi
Fresh arugula
Place the red peppers, cream, and a pinch of garlic powder, salt, & pepper in a food processor. Puree until you have a smooth and well incorporated sauce. You’re looking for a thick sauce, & add a dash more cream if you need more liquid for the sauce. Immediately transfer the sauce to a medium sized sauté pan, and place over medium heat. Add in the parmesan & a pinch of red pepper flakes, stirring to melt and incorporate the cheese into the sauce. Turn the heat to low if the sauce is beginning to bubble rapidly, and add a few dashes of chicken broth if the sauce become too thick. Pour in the beans, cover, and let them cook through for at least 10 minutes.
Cook your pasta to al dente, drain, and add the noodles to the pan with the sauce. Toss to coat the noodles in the sauce, letting them cook together for 5 minutes. Add the arugula in last - just a couple handfuls. Lightly stir. Serve in a warmed bowl and garnish with a light sprinkle with a bit more parmesan to finish it off.
**if you use cauliflower gnocchi, like I did, totally fine to cook the gnocchi first and then add the sauce directly into the pot with cooked gnocchi.